Here I am in the bathysphere again, but with much more adventure under my belt. Can you believe that Laird saw the demon prince of the undead, Orcus? It is quite a terrifying thought--and *thought* it just might have been, as the Decorum Enforcer told us that NO GOD would have been oblivious to our presence. I wonder if Laird is as batty as Illander. Still, if what she saw WAS Orcus, or even looked like Orcus, I'm kinda glad I didn't see it.
Sadush was quieter than normal--he hardly talked at all--perhaps he will soon begin to grow leaves.
Now to take stock of the situation. We are looking for an eladrin teenager or a hyenaman or both. We'll try Malacar, but I don't know how exactly we're supposed to look around. Jacamoolay is clearly a part of things, but we can't have her know that we're investigating her--especially because she's already suspicious of us.
Now let me vent. I miss Erevan terribly, and Daddy too, but I'm beginning to think I don't miss either of them enough. I miss feeling like queen of the world, though, and lording it over the other girls of the Enthusiasm Squad. Being out here on my own--even with the other Chosen Ones by my side--makes me feel lonely and vulnerable. Never mind the fact that I look death in the eye ALMOST EVERY DAY!!!! I'm trying--REALLY trying--to relate to the others. But no, I'm alone in the world, it seems. I wonder if Illander really writes poetry? Perhaps I should try:
Why do I feel so hopeless and bad?
Maybe because I am lonely and sad.
Maybe it's because I don't have my dad,
Or maybe I miss my beautiful lad.*
But maybe it's just cuz I'm a beautiful girl
Alone in her heart and alone in the world.
This is hard!!! Maybe I should try to write a poem that doesn't rhyme, like Illander suggested.
*Erevan is who I mean.
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