From the triple-locked journal of Lairdslen Sonoly

It’s the middle of the night…the blood of the Sahaguin we just killed is still fresh... I can’t get back to sleep. I know I haven’t written for a while now…writing in a diary seems like such a childish thing to me now. I feel so much older and beyond that. But here, I am, writing, on this chilly and moonless eve. It’s getting darker earlier as the season passes, and that only makes me more and more aware of how much I’ve aged this past month.

I think all of us have. Ashleigh, newly resurrected by the clerics of Malikar, even has a streak of gray in her hair. I offered her some of the henna that I use to blacken my (already dark)(I just like it to be extra black)(but it’s practically that way already) hair, but since she’s blonde, it didn’t make much sense, and so the gesture ended up being just an awkward exercise. I hope we’re still friends? Her friendship has come to mean more to me than I ever could have expected. I can tell she is straining to be her old self; but there cannot be any doubt that death, even after resurrection, changes you.

Maybe I died too, a little, with her. The next time I’m at a looking glass, I’ll check for gray streaks.

I wonder how mother and Nails are getting on? I wonder if they’re much older now, too? Nails must be getting tall. That day that the owl of the council flew in our window with that fateful letter…feels like eons ago. I wonder if I’ll ever see him again. The Dungeon Master is gone, stolen by dopplegangers (we suspect sent by the thieving, but powerful, lich of Malikar, Sadiq), and we’ve had to abandon its rescue in favor of more pressing matters. We may never get it back, so our line of communication to the Council – to Valon – is cut, and along with it, any hope of me getting a message to mother.

We are utterly on our own now, chasing down the visions of our dreams with no guidance from the Council, or anyone. Perhaps we are chasing our own deaths – perhaps the council is desperately trying to contact us to tell us, “Turn back! It’s a trap!” It DOES seem suspicious to me that the loss of the Dungeon Master (AND the amulets, and scrolls, and scythes, of the cult of Orcus) coincides exactly with the sudden appearance and infiltration of a VERY suspicious character in our close-knit group.

By all appearances, this “Helena” seems to be one of us, a Chosen One…she recounts the same dreams – of the Hyena Man leaving the Targnol Port cemetery, and of Jacqamule handing off a baby to a tear-tattooed man. Jacqamule claims, and this “Helena” reiterated, that SHE is the baby from all of our dreams…that Jacquamule sold her to Faradon (the tear-tattooed man) , a trafficker of babies from the dragon-ruled isle of Arkturan. But I don’t believe her. I ESPECIALLY don’t believe that she could be my HALF-SISTER??!!! Jacqamule claims that the woman who brought her the babe – Helena’s mother – had been the lover of none other than Valon’s most notorious, womanizing, egotistical, “celebrated” painter – my father. Helena’s mother had asked Jaqamule to kill the infant, and I wish she would have, as this story is CLEARLY (to me) a ruse to cover more sinister origins. Corellon, forgive me for penning such a dark thought, but I cannot deny that I feel it – I do not trust this “Helena.” I believe she is a changling, an illusion, possibly a doppelganger? Possibly sent by Sadiq, instructed to tear our party apart? Perhaps they have secret communications – perhaps Sadiq is gleaning the content of our dreams from the Dungeon Master and psychically communicating these visions to her minion, whom she has disguised as one of us. It is brilliant, really. That could really be it.

It’s not that I doubt that my father had other lovers – I know he did, I’m just one more of his bastards, with which Valon is no doubt sadly overpopulated. It’s that I do not believe that this red-haired, freckled, insufferably cheerful and optimistic girl could possibly be my relation. She is like my opposite.

Curses, it now occurs to me – we are already in the palm of this “Helena” ‘s hand! It is HER maps – which she just “happened” to acquire at a “library” – that we are following! Possibly to our doom?! We are bound for Tarnol Port in Viridistan, so from Malikar we sailed into Warwick (a huge but entirely uninteresting metropolis), and from there gained passage on a fishing boat to the village of Thelemy. We were hoping to get another boat from Thelemy to Maskholm, the next major city on the coast, and from there, strike out by foot to Targnal Port.

We were not able to get a boat out of Thelemy, though, so now we’re walking up the coast, hoping to encounter another village where we can catch another fishing boat going up the coast, and in this way make our way to Maskholm. Maskholm is said to be the domain of an evil illusionist, Bolosh. Corellon!! Perhaps this “Helena” could be one of Bolosh’s creations... perhaps she was, or IS, trying to lure us to him? I am definitely not ruling anything out. I will try to pay closer attention if the subject of Maskholm arises again, and see if her face betrays some secret charge.

Right now we’re camped out on the wet rocks of the coastline…Blech! There was no cover to be found (there was a cave, but it was occupied by a family of bears), so we just made the best shelter we could and are trying to stay warm and dry and possibly even get some sleep. I HAD gotten to sleep before, but was woken up when we were attacked by sea creatures , which Sadush said are called Sahaguin. They were welcome combatants after these last, grueling encounters with entangling vines, swarming spiders, and paralyzing venom. Nonetheless, I can't get back to sleep. I’m writing in hopes that, if I get all these thoughts and fears off my chest, I’ll be able to rest.

We will push on in the morning. I know Viridistan is where we need to go – my dreams could not be making it clearer. I just must remain vigilant in our journey there, and be sure that this “Helena” does not lead us astray.

Illander's Journal

After much strategizing we decided to hire a captain to sail us to a small fishing village where we could then hire another captain to take us further and so on. Our hope is to get as far by ship as possible before making the long walk down to our destination, Tarnul Port.

Sadly, it has not been without difficulties. While I was on watch last night we were overcome by some sort of sea creatures. They were hideously ugly, and I took out their magic user pretty much by myself and got a powerful eldritch wand out of it too. What this creature was doing with an eldritch wand, I'll never know.

On another note, everything is different now. Even Ashleigh has changed, which I suppose one ought to expect when one comes back from the dead via a powerful magic ritual. The vicious and shallow Ashleigh I knew from back in Valon is no more and she's been replaced with a more grounded and serious version, though just as beautiful. She's even been writing poetry!

I haven't discussed my theory with the others. I'm afraid of what they might say if they knew that I wasn't really "chosen", but that my parents negotiated my presense within the party. Great Correllian, I loathe my parents. That said, chosen or no I've become exceedingly powerful and a true asset to the group. I've saved each of them more times than I can count. If any of them dares say I've no place amongst them they'll surely regret it.

P.S. I haven't written a poem in a long time now.

Keep it Secret,
Illander Illrune

Illander's Journal

Dearest Whomever,

I think the swelling on my face is going down. I was bitten by a some sort of spider during the battle at the Ettercap caves, which is unfortunate, as I was rendered speechless just as some very important decisions were being made. So much has happened!

Jackamoolay has lead us to the other Chosen One! Her name is Helena and she's with us now. She doesn't know it, but she may very well be Laird's half sister by way of Valon's most esteemed artist. Her mother gave her to Jackamoolay to poison when she was an infant. Jackamoolay, not having the heart, sold Helena to a black market baby ring near Malacar after she was exiled.

Helena is so smart! She knows exactly where we should go, and we got on Captain Scurvey's boat to go there. We passed up a dinner invitation from Sadique, which I'm not sure was wise. I still believe she has our Dungeon Master and dark ritual items. Sooner or later we'll need to get those back, right?

I'd love to have the Dungeon Master right now. I have some questions for mother and father.

How can there be five Chosen Ones when the prophecy said there were four? Why am I not having the dreams that everybody else is having? I hope nobody reads this...

I don't think I'm "chosen".

I've never admitted that, not even to myself. I suspect that my parents, monsters that they are, forced me into the predicament I'm in now. I know that I was an embarrassment to the Illrunes until I performed the star pact ritual that gave me my powers. I suspect they planted the old book with the ritual for me to find as well.

My connection to the heavens and the fates is both terrifying and comforting. I feel myself changing. I don't know who or what I'm becoming, but I'm starting to think it would be better if I had died at the Ettercap cave. There's a fury growing inside of me that is dangerous.

The others musn't know.

Keep it Secret,
Illander Illrune

Day 11, Ashleigh's War Journal

So much has happened. I hardly know where to begin--we have left Malacar and have started a grand new adventure across the sea! Laird has met her long-lost half-sister, who Jacamoolay sold into slavery sixteen years ago! These events are truly thrilling, but why do I feel so out of touch with reality?

I have...changed, or something. I don't feel like myself. Are the others looking at me strangely? I mean, Sadush always *did* look at me strangely--but the others--I think they notice it too. My meeting with Queen Valonia in the other world did it to me--her cold white hand!--I dream about that in addition to my other dreams. I feel stronger, in some ways, but weaker in others--like, if I had to lead the Eladrin Elite Enthusiasm Squad in a Tripartite Pyramidal Cheer of Absolute Elitism, I don't think I could do it. But I feel stronger as a warrior, and the magic that...Erevan...taught me has found a new outlet in my sword, to which I feel strangely attached these days. It's as if it's become a part of me. But somehow it doesn't feel like that old magic, which I seem to have totally forgotten.

Erevan! Why did I forget his name when we wrote to Valon? I hadn't given a thought to him after I woke up from being dead. And when I remembered him, it was like trying to remember someone from a really, really long time ago. W.J., I don't think I love him. I don't think I love...ANYBODY.

At least I have my poetry. It's my one connection to the old Ashleigh!

When once the vessels passed from Valon's view,
Horizon-bound, a star-like glimmering
Remained, to their passage testament,
And vanished moments hence; the sunset burned
Upon the water; and then the sea
Did darken with the night, did swallow
Night, and by the night seemed swallowed.
And Valon wept for tribulation sure,
And hoped for victory less certain.

Day 10, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dear W.J.,

I died. And then I came back! Not just knocked out, you know, but actually DEAD!!! Don't worry, I'm STILL the same old Ashleigh. The screeching tangleweed might have done us in (again), but they didn't do in the heart and soul of the Eladrian Elite Enthusiasm Squad. The others brought me back to town on a stretcher. I believe they must have been tearing their hair out with grief over the fall of their leader. And now, now that I have seen the other world and come back, I think they believe I'm even more of a hero than ever. Damn it, though, I'm NOT pleased about this streak of grey hair. Perhaps I'll dye it. Maybe it'll be another girls' day out for me and Laird soon.

Now let me tell you about being dead. It's like being asleep, except totally different, because you KNOW that you're dead and your WHOLE BEING is walking through the dark. I can't remember all of it--but it was terrible--and strangely exhilarating at the same time--I have a memory of meeting Avalonia, queen of Valon and family matriarch, who showed me all sorts of things, past, present, and future, and touched me with her cold white hand. I saw things important to the Chosen Ones, including--well, I'll tell you more about it later.

But guess what? Like I said, I'm still the same old Ashleigh, W.J. Don't worry. I'm even working on my new hobby of poetry still!

SING, oh Muse, of war; of storms that shook
The sea host who, trembling inwardly,
But with fair faces imperturbable,
Upon the wine-dark waves with resolution
Scudded; behold the elven ships all sleek
And white, the prows all forward pending
Like spears of silver, gleaming sharp;
The officers with longswords poised, proud host!
The mages wise, with subtle abjurations
Taming wild serf and quelling winds;
And, tallest standing, dragons' bane,
The paladins with arms and armor holy
Who stood stern-faced against Orichilan.

Illander's Journal

Dear Whomever,

It seems darkness surrounds us at every turn. We've lost the dungeon master and the dark ritual items we were carrying. We were tricked by dopplegangers. We're in the middle of a forest with a wood elf guide named Kumala. He's nice enough, but sort of dull. I can tell that Ashleigh likes him because she's always flinging her hair around and biting her bottom lip whenever she catches a glimpse of his abdominal muscles. By Corellian, I'm becoming so mean! ashleigh's been very kind to me, even giving me some of her Jasmine oil for my bath. She's even taken up poetry, though I'm sure it couldn't be as good as mine. My poems are like if I had slit my wrists and let the blood drip onto a page. That's how real they are, which nobody understands.

Anyway, we were nearly destroyed by screaming plants that we were supposed to procure for Jockamoolay in return for information. Even I was almost felled. Me! And I'm never hit! I honestly don't know what to do next. We can't go back to Jackamoolay empty handed, but these creatures just might be too strong for us to fight. And what about our dungeon master?

I've acquired a dark new power that I haven't told the others about. I'm somewhow able to call upon a darkness from the stars full of tiny biting mouths. I haven't used it yet, but I have to say I'm starting to adjust to my power. I'm actually starting to like it.

One last thing, and Corellian I hope nobody sneaks a peak at this journal, but I've stopped having the prophetic dreams. First I noticed that my dreams were different than the other chosen ones' and now they've stopped entirely. What does it all mean?

Blood.
Sweat.
Piss.
This is what the world is.
This is what the world is.
Hungry.
Tired.
Dangerous.
This is what Illander is.
This is what Illander is.
Stunning.
Cruel.
Nimble.
This is what _________ is.
This is what__________is.
With _________ you don't notice the other stuff too much.

Keep it Secret,
Illander Illrune

Day 9, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dearest W.J.,

The lessons of the High Botanist really could have come in handy, as screeching...thistleweed? adventureweed? arugula? (it almost killed me, but I still can't get the name right) was nearly the end of all of us. Things got a little better once I realized, midway through the battle, that I could move my arms and legs and attack after all, but we were still almost done in by those distant cousins of Sadush. They really had it in for him, btw. Anyway, I think we need to reconsider our goals. Our task for Jacamoolay has turned out to be more than a mere errand, and if we want to do the plant creatures in we will have to invent a better strategy. On the other hand, we could just return to her empty-handed, but I assume she won't like that.

TOP SECRET!!!!
The wild elf who is our guide is so handsome. I find myself strangely attracted to him despite his wild garb and unkempt hair--or is it because of these things? He is not like any eladrin I know, certainly not like Erevan. But he is still SO HANDSOME. But he is also a coward, it seems, and his eating habits are truly disgusting. And of course I'm in love with Erevan anyway, right? I probably just miss him so much and am trying not to think about him and so that's why I keep forgetting he even exists...right?

I am going to attempt another poem. I wonder if I should show my works to Illander? On second thought, NEVER!

Wild elf in the trees
Why do I think of bees
When I sees
Your hair in the breeze?

Bees in the flowers
Full of pretty powers--
Of buzzing and honey
When it is sunny!

Day 8, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dear W.J.,

In the middle of the woods right now, looking for ettercap venom and...stinkweed? Slippery elm? Purple cone-flower? I should have paid more attention to the lessons of the High Botanist. I hope Laird wrote the name down down. It's been a fun few days, and even though we're in the middle of the woods, it's dark, we were just beset by about thirty rats (I took out--hmm--twenty-seven of them?) and betrayed by our doppelganger guides, I am more certain than ever that I am a Chosen One and a great destiny awaits me.

I have to admit that a lot of it has to do with getting away from that wretched island and being back in civilization--if that's what you want to call Malacar--AND getting to take a bath at the Spotted Lion. AND being away from the boys. Laird is no Eladrin Enthusiasm Squadette, but she's actually kinda fun, and we had a blast together while the boys idled around the marketplace and accomplished almost nothing. Laird and I, on the other hand, had the following great adventures together:

1. The adventure of the ivory comb, in which I purchased an ivory comb for Laird and surprised her with it.
2. The adventure of Jacamoolay's shop, in which we learned more about the mysterious seller of poisons, including the fact that she had an affair with the Lrod Mayor of Malacar. We also very subtly made offer of our adventuring services to her, so that I am sure she considers us very valuable heroes and perhaps even potentially great friends. No word of her son, however.
3. The adventure of the Mayor's lizard livestock, in which we decided not to participate in cleaning up after lizards.
4. The adventure of the nefarious guides, in which we are still participating. The guides led us to this very spot in the woods and abandoned us/led us into a rat-trap. I have no doubt that these are the same guides who attacked us on the beach disguised as Maleogre and Diane. We also saw them again in Jacamoolay's shop. We followed them here against MY better judgment, and have had our magic scroll stolen. NOTE TO SELF: Listen to better judgment ALWAYS.
5. The adventure of the baths and jasmine oil, in which we took baths after purchasing luxurious jasmine oil.

Day ??, let’s call it day 10? Maybe -- Laird’s Triple-Locked Journal

I think…I’m going crazy. Do you know, necessarily, when you’re going crazy? Or is it when you’re convinced that you’re *not* crazy… that it’s totally conceivable that... oh, you just happened to bump into a 60 foot tall demon prince of the undead (who, by the way, doesn’t exist anymore)…maybe that’s the tip-off that, yes, you’re crazy.

So yes, did I mention that I went to the Shadowfell ?! And, you know, we fought and killed some demons, no big whoop, and then I was sneaking along, minding my own business, and I happened upon, um, ORCUS?! Who was standing there, not 20 feet away from me, surrounded in prayer (or something) by a vampire, a wight, and a demon? I couldn’t…believe what I was seeing, but I also wasn’t dumb enough to stick around for another heartbeat to either confirm or deny my vision.

I don’t even remember what I did next, it was like a dream…or a nightmare…I remember a lot of running and holding my breath. Then there was another ride in the bathysphere back to Malakar, I barely remember it.

It’s weird, I’ve been thinking moment-to-moment for so long now, I can’t convince my body or my brain to relax. Plus, I don’t feel like I *should*, even if I could. I don’t think the others believe me…what I saw…I don’t believe it myself. But what else could it have been?? And real or illusion, what could it mean in either case??

I swear, I never thought I’d be so happy to be trapped in an underwater Bathysphere with a re-animated dead body, a blabbermouthed and possibly psychotic alchemist, and of course the rest of the “chosen ones.” If you think about it, it seems so unlikely that the four of us could ever conceivably work together… if you take a step back for two seconds, it’s pretty funny, really…there’s me, a sarcastic and mostly useless (and possibly crazy) shoplifter, and we’ve also got a spoiled daddy’s-girl / leader of the Eladrin enthusiasm squad, a pimply-faced green suck-up, and a walking cliché of a brooding teen poet. But, work together we do…I have come to depend on Ashleigh, Saddush and Ileander to an almost inconceivable extent. I mean, I literally trust them with my life, and they’ve saved me when I thought I was a goner…more times than I can count already! It’s scary.

These last few days in particular… I honestly didn’t think I was going to make it out of that one to even WRITE in this journal! We are truly bound together now, for better or worse, to see the outcome of these sinister dreams out, for better or worse.

So we’ve come back to Malakar to see what we can uncover with our inquiries rather than our swords. We are just not powerful enough to face whatever evil is brewing in the Shadowfell. Some sort of cult or something? The lizardman who spearheaded (no pun intended, haha!) the ritual sacrifices / necromantic conversions of the halflings of Skaversmoore, we killed him, but now we see he’s just one figure in a larger plot. Some ancient evil is awakening in the tomb of the dragon emporer – some evil connected to an ancient Arushulan empire. Inside the tomb, we found a strange portal to the Shadowfell, where we saw countless evil beings wearing the same flaming-skull amulet (which I now realize is a reference to Orcus’ legendary skull-headed mace), and carrying similar scythes as our original adversary. We’ve all had dreams about a hyena man entering a mausoleum…an infant child being carried away by Jaquamule, the Eladrin poison-broker who Ashleigh and Ileander visited in Malakar.

My head spins with how all these things might connects. Actually my head just hurts. I banged it about 10 times when we were fighting these behemoths by the river…they had these mace-like tails, and they kept knocking me down, it was infuriating!! Anyway, I’d better get some rest and see if I can’t get rid of this headache. I just pray to Corellon to sleep peacefully, without dreams…or if I am to dream, let it be of frivolities of no consequence.

Day 7, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dearest W.J.,

Here I am in the bathysphere again, but with much more adventure under my belt. Can you believe that Laird saw the demon prince of the undead, Orcus? It is quite a terrifying thought--and *thought* it just might have been, as the Decorum Enforcer told us that NO GOD would have been oblivious to our presence. I wonder if Laird is as batty as Illander. Still, if what she saw WAS Orcus, or even looked like Orcus, I'm kinda glad I didn't see it.

Sadush was quieter than normal--he hardly talked at all--perhaps he will soon begin to grow leaves.

Now to take stock of the situation. We are looking for an eladrin teenager or a hyenaman or both. We'll try Malacar, but I don't know how exactly we're supposed to look around. Jacamoolay is clearly a part of things, but we can't have her know that we're investigating her--especially because she's already suspicious of us.

Now let me vent. I miss Erevan terribly, and Daddy too, but I'm beginning to think I don't miss either of them enough. I miss feeling like queen of the world, though, and lording it over the other girls of the Enthusiasm Squad. Being out here on my own--even with the other Chosen Ones by my side--makes me feel lonely and vulnerable. Never mind the fact that I look death in the eye ALMOST EVERY DAY!!!! I'm trying--REALLY trying--to relate to the others. But no, I'm alone in the world, it seems. I wonder if Illander really writes poetry? Perhaps I should try:


Why do I feel so hopeless and bad?
Maybe because I am lonely and sad.
Maybe it's because I don't have my dad,
Or maybe I miss my beautiful lad.*

But maybe it's just cuz I'm a beautiful girl
Alone in her heart and alone in the world.

This is hard!!! Maybe I should try to write a poem that doesn't rhyme, like Illander suggested.

*Erevan is who I mean.

Illander's Journal

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Day 5, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dear Diary War Journal,

It's going to be hard for me to get used to your new name! Anyway, I have a great victory to report. The Chosen Ones entered the Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, destroyed the lizardman shaman, and now have the amulet we have all seen in our dreams. Almost as important as all that was the discovery of a new little friend.

Diary War Journal, Lil' Genius is made of onyx. It looks like he's a chihuahua statue, and really, he is...Until I say his name! Then appears beside me the loveliest little lively breathing chihuahua-dog you, I, or ANYONE has ever seen, with glossy big eyes and short black hair and paws that clatter and tap. So cute! I do wish, though, that he didn't have to disappear after eight hours, so he could curl up beside me when I rest. I am very lonely these days!

The other Chosen Ones are company, I guess, but--well, there are some problems. Sadush is nice--there, I said it--but, you know, GREEN. Laird clearly respects and perhaps worships me, but it's SO HARD to be a GODDESS!!! Illander--He's really beginning to grate on me. It's clear that he has massive insecurities that he covers up by being mean to other people, like me. I know he can't use real magic because he's not smart enough, has handsome and talented older brothers that make him look like the family goblin, and would rather be in a bubble bath with Ambassador Telimqiv than tromping around in the desolate wilderness,--but SERIOUSLY?

Well, at least I have the company of Lil' Genius. Aw, he's chasing his tail! Bye bye War Journal.

Dearest Erevan,

You'd be so proud of me if you could see me now. My powers have grown exponentially since leaving home! Just today I figured out how to produce balls of fire, which really came in handy against some undead we encountered in a mausoleum today.

I don't know how much mother and father have told you. We're on an isolated island (which we came to via a maniacal alchemist's bathysphere, but that's another story) because we'd been having dreams about halflings being ritually sacrificed by lizard people. These dreams turned out to be true and we were nearly slaughtered by the lizard folk until their leader (a teen, like me) ran off.

We tracked him to the Crypt of the Dragon King where we slaughtered him and his followers, which included two acid blobs... very difficult to kill, though I have to say my party owes a huge debt to my pact with the stars. I've saved them all now at least once. Anyway, we retrieved some dark magic items from the mausoleum... don't know what we'll do with them.

The real reason I'm writing this letter to you though is to discuss Ashleigh. I'm really worried about her, brother. While she's always been a little bossy and controlling, she seems to have completely lost control of her senses. She's become entirely cruel to the other three of us, me in particular. She says the vilest things about both me and our family and now she's got Sadush on her side. He said he wished they had a "real magic user" in the party, which really hurt my feelings. My powers have saved him time and time again!

Worst of all, and this is the hardest part to write, Ashleigh seems to rejoice in killing just for the sport of it. I wish I could say it was only our foes, but she's taken to slaughtering cats and birds and woodland creatures and eating them raw. She collects their bones in a little pouch like precious gems. She doesn't know I know, so don't say anything. The darkness we've encountered on our mission is indescribable and I understand how a person could snap.

I hate to be the one to say these things, but Ashleigh is no longer the girl you knew, nor do I think she will be again. I look into her and I see a sticky black heart made of pitch. You told me shortly before I left that you were going to propose to her. I love you, brother, and you know I love Ashleigh, but I strongly suggest you hold off until she receives serious help, if not just reconsidering all together. I only write these things because of my concern for both your and Ashleigh's well being. I know they are difficult to read. Please be discreet in sharing this information. I fear for my safety around Ashleigh now. As such, and this goes without saying, please don't tach her any more magic until we're sure she can wield it wisely.

I love you, brother. You and Iagon would be so proud of me. Is he still with the Mer people? Give my love to mother and father!

Always Your Baby Brother,
Illander Illrune

Laird's thoughts as she floats between life and death

I’m floating in the darkness. It feels so nice here! Nice and warm and dark. There was a faint light earlier, but it’s just a pinprick now. I don’t remember any of my problems. Why isn’t everyone here, it’s so nice! How did I get here? Let’s see, the last thing I remember… (flashes of crocodile jaws, teeth, slits of eyes, tremendous weight and strength overtaking me) AAAAAH! No no, that can’t have been real. (Flashback of Ashleigh telling me to get away and shut the door) Oh, that girl! Oh now I remember! We were all on a quest together. Ashleigh? (Flashback of Ashleigh asking if I want to have a girl talk) She and the green guy…Saddush (flashback of Saddush, smiling, backlit cinematically by the sun)… were captured…but they’re ok after all! I think?
(Flashback of Ileander trying to heal me) Oh him, he’s so nice! Ileander? He came to my aid, he tried to save me. Oh Corellon! Does that mean I’m dead? I don’t feel like I am. I feel like I’d know if I were.
(Flashback of Arterious the Bear saying “You are the Chosen Ones.” It echoes: chosen ones…chosen ones…chosen ones…) Oh that’s right! Oh, smelly dungheaps! (Flashback of adventure thus far. Flashes of teammates. Flashback of Halfling tribesmen falling in battle.) I guess I have to go back. But…maybe not yet...maybe I can float here in this nice darkness for a while longer…

Day 4, Illander's Diary

Dearest Whomever,

I never thought I'd be so glad to see the inside of this wretched bathysphere. The attack on the lizardmen's compound was an utter failure, though we did manage to save Ashleigh and Sadush (not that I heard any thanks from either of them).

Most of the halflings we brought with us, after barely convincing them to fight, fell in battle. I am certain I will never forgive myself for not protecting them better. To make matters worse, Laird nearly fell twice. I did everything I could, but in the end I couldn't do much.

I suck.

If we are the chosen ones then why can't we do anything right? Are we supposed to learn something from all of this? What are we chosen for?

The strangest thing of all is that at our darkest hour a lizardman sorceror of some sort let us go. He had a strange amulet around his neck which I could tell to be of infernal origin. we couldn't speak to him because none of us can speak Draconic, but he seemed to be the same age as us. Are there chosen ones for the side of evil?

To do over the coming days: find out who this lizard sorceror is, translate the Draconic runes on the tablets into common, find out what purpose our presence on the island serves, nurse Laird back to health.

Also, write Erevan a letter about Ashleigh. I wonder how Iagon is faring with the merpeople. Better than I am here, hopefully.

A new poem:

The cold, cold touch
of death
you wear
like a cloak around you
is beautiful
when your hair is blowing in the wind.
It becomes you.
But do not wear it long for
you are chosen
hand picked for great deeds,
by elves and humans alike.
Your people.
And yet not your people.
You are alone.
And yet not alone.

Day 4, Ashleigh's War Journal

Dear Diary, WAR JOURNAL,

I guess these lizardfolk mean business. Somehow we survived the battle in their lair, but it was disastrous. I heard from the others that they tried a frontal assault and that something they called a "vine whore" slew most of the halflings (such strange creatures abound outside of Valon! Flying dolphins, translucent pianomen, and now prostitutes made of plants. Good thing Sadush didn't see her--HAHA!) Of course, things might have gone better had *I* been leading them and not Illander and Laird--whom I of course managed to save from being eaten by a crocodile--one of my goals, BTW, is to save her from HERSELF--We have a makeover planned and she will no doubt be partial to ANYTHING I suggest--but I plan to be kind, not cruel--cruelty is really not a part of my nature.

Anyway, we're now heading back to the dreary halfling settlement in this dreary bathysphere. Everyone is in low spirits, myself included. I do not know why the lizardman shaman we've seen in our dreams decided to spare us, but I know one thing--I'LL MAKE HIM REGRET IT.

So why have I started calling you a war journal, dearest diary? Well, I'm going to make some plans. It is what all the great commanders do--Granddad did it--and because I'm already a great commander I feel a little late to the party, you know? So here goes:

STRATEGIES FOR THE FUTURE
1. Frontal Assault? No. Tried that with a bathysphere and failed. The lizardmen will be prepared next time, and I fear we saw only a portion of their forces and only a small bit of their wretched dungeon.
2. Rear Assault? I do not think they have a rear--and if they did, Illander would probably have investigated it already because he is a homosexual.
3. Floor plan? This is where the halflings can help us. They live in a big stone dragon statue too, so maybe their network of caves is similar or identical to the lizardmen's. And MAYBE just MAYBE there's a secret entrance somewhere. A small party--say four CHOSEN ONES--could investigate, proceeding carefully and running if things looked too grim.
4. Return to Valon? No--we're here and any time we lose could help the enemies. I do not think they understand who they are dealing with--yet.
5. What about the rest of the island? If the lizardmen decide to make war on *us*, we need to know the lay of the land. Ask halflings.
6. Draconic runes: ask the halflings.
7. Consult Dungeon Master for any research problems, but do not bother trying to talk to Daddy because he is SO busy, probably with STEPMANTICORE. Daddy, Daddy, I'm through! For instance, ask about the possibility of EVIL CHOSEN ONES. The lizardman shaman looked to be about OUR age.

Day 3: Sadush Seaborn, at the bottom of a pit with Ashleigh, awaiting sacrifice by lizardmen, to the halfling prisoners:

“Don’t mind Ashleigh not saying hello, she’s just preoccupied, trying to think of a way out of here. She’s not so bad. I guess she’ll never think the same about me though. On our way here, I asked the alchemist – yeah, Maleogre – to consult the I Ching and ask if Ashleigh would ever love me or at least be nice to me. He said the sticks indicated The Wall, an insurmountable barrier. So I guess that’s that. Wow she sure can pace. Makes this pit smell like rose petals. Look at her shake her head – she’s not giving up! Maybe if I was more than just a human I would find that kind of courage. She might as well be facing this alone for all the help I’m giving her – hey wait did you see? She just looked right at me! What does that mean? Maybe she doesn’t feel so alone, maybe -- oh man now she’s just sitting there all depressed. You can just tell she’s full of dark, disturbing thoughts. Maybe I should just go over there and put my arm around her to make her feel better. Should I? What would you do? I’m going … uh oh I’m not going over there, now she’s just making a fist and looking pissed! Don’t look at her, she’ll bite your head clean off. Seriously, don’t mess with her when she’s in that mood. Oh okay it’s cool now she’s smiling. She’s gorgeous isn’t she. I can’t help it. If I could just get back my sword I swear I’d kill enough of the lizardmen for her to feystep away. It would at least give her a chance! If I could just get up this wall – hey wait. The WALL of this pit! Being captured by lizardmen to be sacrificed to the green flamed skull. Now THAT’S an insurmountable barrier! Maybe the I Ching wasn’t saying there’s a wall between us that I can never cross, maybe it’s saying that she’ll love me when we’re BOTH going against that WALL!!! That’s it, I knew that there had to be a way! All fucking right! Hey she’s smiling – maybe she knows that I’m going to rescue her. She’s got such great hair. Now how hard would it be to climb out of this pit … not so hard …

Ashleigh, I’ve got an idea!”

Day 3, Illander's Diary

Dear Whomever,

Things have gone from dark to dismal. After the longest bathysphere ride with an undead captain I hope I ever take, we arrived on the tiny island that was our destination. While aboard the bathysphere I took in a session of the I Ching, a sort of fortune telling game. The old alchemist threw some bones down and lo and behold I received "the well". What do you suppose that means? I'll tell you-- a fundamental inability to complete my life's goals. Terrific.

Ashleigh of course took this ride as an opportunity to make nastly little comments about my journaling and my poetry. Sadush was being terribly forthright with Maleogre and so very moral. I've always considered myself a good person, but out here in the world... I don't know. It's taxing to always be so fair and moral and sugary sweet.

Once we landed we got Maleogre the Alchemist to agree to wait for us on the beach. As you know, we traveled here because of the dreams we've been having in which halflings are sacrificed by lizardfolk beneath immense stone dragons. What's strange is that the dragons on the island are not the dragons I've been dreaming about. The stautues in my dreams are much more ominous. I didn't tell the other three. None of them said anything about it, so I assume the dragon statues on the island are, indeed, the same stautues from their dreams. Why then am I having different dreams.

The halflings on the island were less than amicable and seemed generally upset to have a warlock in their midst. They claimed that their lot and the lizardfolk had always lived peacefully on opposite ends of the island. They would offer no help unless we could prove the lizardfolk had indeed sacrificed halflings. That said, we set a path for the other end of the island.

We were confronted with such horror! Scores and scores of animated halfling skeletons guarding the entrance to some sort of lizardfolk compound! Ashleigh, much to my chagrin, has been learning magic and took three skeletons out with one fell swoop. I know she's only doing this to be mean to me. I'm starting to really hate my brother, Erevan. Ashleigh's magic was not enough nor, to be fair, was mine. Ashleigh and Sadush were nearly killed and were taken into the compund. Thank Correllian that Laird survived. I'm waiting for her on the beach as I write this.

It is up to us now. I've brought a halfling skeleton with me as a proof that their people are being sacrificed to nefarious ends. I hope they see the light.

What's most surprising in all of this is that I am the one still alive. I am the one entrusted to rescue the others. I don't think anybody, myself included, thought this possible. As it turns out, I am the most powerful and not Ashleigh.

Please let me find the strength to continue.

No time for poetry!

Keep It Secret,
Illander Illrune

Day 3, Laird's Triple-Locked Journal

From the Triple-Locked Journal of Laird Sonoly...

Oh Corellon!! I know I should keep running, I've got to find Ileander and rescue the others, but I just have to stop for a moment... my heart is in my throat, I can't breathe... I'm pretty sure I'm not being pursued, so I think I can take a moment or two here to rest.

Ashleigh and Sadush have been captured by lizardmen, and taken inside some compound, through the legs of a giant dragon statue (the very statue from my dreams!). I am praying that the lizardmen don't sacrifice them, that we don't meet their bones later in the marsh, stripped of flesh, empty eye sockets glowing red. Such abberations of nature, such mockeries of life, ugh! That's a sight I won't forget soon: when we first approached the lizardmen's side of the island (we're on Skaver's Moor D'More Island, but more on that later), we found it guarded by the undead skeletons of some of the missing halfling tribesmen. We fought them competently enough, but in the thick of battle, lizardmen began emerging and joining the frey. We'd kill one off and two would emerge to replace the last... I barely stayed on my feet! I was hit with more arrows than I could count, but I'm also tougher than I look. Everyone fought bravely, with Ashleigh and Saddush doing most of the heavy fighting. Unfortunately, this also meant they were the first to be felled and captured, which is exactly what happened! Lizardmen grabbed them and *walked* over the water of the marsh-moat (which I later tried to swim and nearly drowned doing so) to their compound. I did manage to make it across the moat, even after an evil lizardman druid caused the vines and stalks of the marshes to come to life, wrapping around me and trying to take me down to the bottom of the water. Although I wanted to push past him and chase after Saddush and Ashleigh (whom I had just started to come to like), but based on the noise I heard beyond the dragon's legs...I have a feeling it would have been really foolish to run in there, alone, and nearly dead as I am. So I turned around, jumped back IN the moat, and swam back from whence we'd come, in retreat. Ileander had already fled, and I'm hoping I can find him after this. We've got to convince the halfling tribesmen to help us so we can wage a more balanced attack on the lizardmen -- we now have no doubt that they ARE up to evil ends, capturing and sacrificing the halfling tribesmen who they were supposedly friends with?

I've got to press on and find Ileander, but in case I don't make it to write again...I want whomever to know, that I tried. I tried to do what was asked of me. I never asked to be chosen! I think I understand now, what Arterius the Bear meant, when he apologized for such a heavy burden being put on ones so young. Maybe it's *too* great of a burden. I don't know. But there's no turning back now.

Day 3, Ashleigh Oberholt's Internal Monologue While Cruelly Imprisoned by Lizardmen

[Pacing.] How could this have happened? I am a Chosen One! A ridiculous series of events makes me fall on the field of battle--and I wake to find myself imprisoned by lizardmen, who, as everyone knows, are vicious disgusting cannibals, and as I know very well from my yeah-I-get-it repetitious dream sequences are also into sacrificing their victims. [Shaking head in wonder.] (I DID NOT know that they move three times as fast as other creatures and can walk on water, like the famous wine merchant of Viridistan.) Viridistan--Hmm, at least Sadush is here. [Glancing at Sadush.] That I ever thought myself capable of thinking THAT, or that I should consider myself glad to see his verdant hide--it makes me feel more dismal than ever. [Sitting down, head in hands.] If only Daddy had seen me off, perhaps I would have had the strength to smash that lizardman's skull. Doesn't he know that without his confidence in me I have...less...confidence in myself? Dark, disturbing thoughts. [Shaking head as if to rid herself of dark, disturbing thoughts.] In any case, if I die here, I am glad that he probably won't know that I failed miserably before I died--hmm--but then Valon would fall--and as a consequence he would *still* know that I failed!!! SO I MUSTN'T FAIL [Clenching her first unconsciously]. I have to get out of here. Perhaps Laird and Illander are seeking help. They both seem like people that don't mind asking for help once in a while--I know that I DON'T--which is, I guess, why they are who they are and why I am who I am--fiercely independent and beautiful. [Smiling slightly, despite the wretched circumstances.] Well, I can't blame myself in any way for being here, which is a relief. [Stands up and flips hair resolutely, then, struck by a thought, gropes in her backpack.] And we still have the Dungeon Master!!!

Day 2, Laird's Triple-Locked Journal

From the private, triple-locked journal of Laird Sonoly:

Oh Corellon, if *I* am one of the chosen ones, if *I*, out of all the humans and elves and half-elves and eladrin and dwarves and halflings and dragonborn in the whole world (??) was chosen to be some sort of great hero...well, I'm just really scared for the world, that's all. I am just pathetic. I feel like such a failure already. Maybe I shouldn't've been healed from the filth fever, maybe it's appropriate that that rat bit me. I dunno.

But, I *was* healed, and I guess I'm glad, I definitely do feel better...if I'd thought there was any romance to suffering from a wasting illness, far from home, I now know the truth. It's not romantic at all, it's just awful.

Anyway. So we went to the goblin's cave to retrieve the magicum core for the crazy inventor guy, the one who's gonna get us to Skaversmoor D'Moor Island (err, I hope). I finally got to one-up that know-it-all Ashleigh, because I *do* know a little goblin and no one else did. But of course she twisted it all around, I told her I knew it from my ex-bf (because he was a fence and he dealt w/ a lot of goblins), and she started joking that either he WAS a goblin, or that he and I read each other goblin love poems or some nonsense. Anyway. She can think what she wants I guess. I still messed things up right off the bat, though. I tried to trick the goblins into coming out to play cards with us, but I couldn't think of a fake name fast enough (I can think of like twenty right now, of course, but at that moment my mind went blank) and they saw through me and attacked us. And of course the head one wasn't even a goblin, it was a HOBgoblin, which, I mean I acted all, "Oh, they're pretty much the same thing," but, ah-NOOO, I know from Kenneth that they are smarter and tougher and I was like, crap.

Since I clearly totally suck at fighting (I couldn't even defend myself against a RAT), I figured I'd let the others do what they do best, and help *them* out by doing what *I* do best...or, what I thought I did best. I slipped through the battle and inside the cave to find the magicum core. Maybe I could redeem myself by retrieving it while they others distracted the goblins!? But, not so simple, turns out the "cave" was a whole complex. Not huge, mind you, but big enough that it wasn't just in and out. But thank Corellon no one was around, because I couldn't even pick a stupid lock to get through the first door, UGH, so ridiculous. And when I finally did, I was so pleased with myself, I walked right into a trap. A BABY could have seen that trap, I can't believe how much I spaced. I was just so upset about how badly I'd messed up already, but then I just made it worse by messing up more because I was distracted thinking about the first mess-ups.

Eventually, the others caught up with me and bailed me out. Ashleigh of course was able to get some laughs at my expense. I was like the punchline of a joke, sitting there at the bottom of a stupid 10 foot pit. Things got a little better after that, we encountered more goblins, and this time I stayed and fought, and actually did some damage! I think I even felled one, with a shot from my crossbow! Saddush did most of the heavy lifting, though, he is just inSANE. I mean, not insane, he is just really really good. And modest too, unlike Ashleigh! Ileander did a lot of fey warlock stuff, he just whispered words to a bunch of the goblins, and they cringed and fell and shrieked. I wonder what he said?? I kind of envied those goblins a little bit, I don't think I'd mind if Ileander were to whisper in my ear, it looked kinda sexy in a dark way. But then he got caught in an avalanche when one of the stone walls crumbled on top of him. I wanted to do something, but what could I do?? Nothing. I just froze and stared helplessly. Thank Corellon he ended up being ok, but I know he's mad at all of us, even if he keeps it to himself.

Anyway, eventually we got the goblin leader to surrender, and he gave us the magicum core just like that. It didn't look like I thought it would, it's just, like, a cylindar of regular stone. I think I thought it would look like a sparkly brain? Not sure. We got it back to the guy, who was SO out of it, he didn't even get it when we told him that the goblins had been *hired* by some wizard he apparently knows! And he almost forgot all about the bathysphere and us, too, but we reminded him. Hopefully we'll be going in the morning! I say hopefully, but really I should say "dreadfully." I'm sure I'm going to mess up a bunch more stuff tomorrow. I just pray to Corellon that I can have my wits about me and not be a total doof again!

Day 2, Illander's Diary

Dearest Whomever,

Do you ever feel like you're trapped inside of yourself? That's how I've been feeling lately. I feel like I'm trapped inside of myself and there's this power that is dying to get out. I find it difficult to expres smyself and recently I've just totally holed up inside my own head. We fought a goblin army and I just couldn't do anything right. I even got caught beneath an avalance and the others just totally ignored me. Even Laird! I mean, I know Sadush is goofy over Ashleigh, but I thought maybe Laird would help me out. I almost died and nobody said one single word about it or lifted one finger to aid me!

I suppose I'll just have to keep trying to win their affections. After all, I'm chosen too. I'm also, special, right? Or is that a lie? I have to admit I don't feel special. I mean, accept for my arcane connection with the heavens or whatever.

How come it smells like rose petals after Ashleigh fey steps and like burning hair and electricity when I do it?

I should do daily affirmations to remind myself that I deserve to be on this adventure.

After we slayed the goblins Sadush threw up. I don't understand why. I mean, I know they're unpleasant little things, but honestly I kind of liked killing them a little. It feels good to shoot crackling energy from the stars through my wand. Oh yeah, I have a wand now.

Another poem I've been working on:

Jagged rocks
from an ancient wall.
Crash down and take this goblin.
Take me too.
Send me to death's dark bosom
where I will nurse from eternity's teet.
Forever.
Forever darknes and quiet.
I don't want
to smell rose petals anymore.
God, I am so depressing. I'm about to take a ride on a bathysphere. Let's hope the journey helps my weary old soul.


Keep it secret,
Illander Illrune

Day 2, Ashleigh Oberholt to Erevan Illrune

Dearest Erevan,

I am SO LONELY without you!!! You would not believe where I am staying--a rickety old house inhabited by a rickety old alchemist. I am so tired of the filth that seems to be everywhere that *isn't* Upper Valon--today we had to descend into the caves of some goblins to get a piece of magicum. My leadership prevailed, and the goblin leader gave us the magicum without much of a fight--Or rather, after I had planted on his sorry hide the most glorious sword swipe of the day.

Sadush felled four goblins all at once, which was impressive, but he vomited afterwards (after becoming the greenest shade of green I believe anyone has ever seen), which was LESS SO. But his Valonian training has clearly done him good. He is definitely learning from me, too, and I never fail to give him a few pointers after battle!!!

It is strange how powerful your little brother has become so fast--but I suppose it is not so much his own power as that of having been born a Chosen One. He is a little cold toward me, but he has always envied you. It is also very likely he secretly thinks I'm beautiful.

Ugh! The filthy half-elf, who just so happens to speak Goblin (of course), keeps nosing around. Did you know that she pretended to be blind in order to get a free sandwich? NOT very heroic. Today she fell into a trap (which I believe if she is supposed to do anything right it's look for traps, right???!?) and also insulted me after I gently asked whether being in a goblin hole aroused her (I believe she had a goblin boyfriend who read her poetry in that language).

Just this past moment I was finally able to make fire: the logs in the fireplace burst into flame--just like you taught me!!!

xoxoxo

Ashleigh

P.S. Tomorrow we ride in the bathysphere. I am confused about how it works.
P.P.S. The goblins somehow had a suit of eladrin chainmail which was PERFECT for me. It very nicely accentuates my breasts (which as you know are quite shapely) and is studded with rose quartz and decorated with a silvery filigree of acanthus leaves and daisies. Its style is old and I do not think it was made in Valon. Retro and pink are BOTH in--NOT that you would know, you are SO MANLY and must detest this girlish talk!!!
P.P.P.S. Have you seen Father?

Day 2, Sadush's Conversation at the Pendulous Bosom

Sadush Seaborn, at the Inn of the Pendulous Bosom, the night before our expedition against the goblins:



“You’re really a Bard? Wow, in Valon – I mean, at home … uhhh I’ve never been to Valon! Huh, I don’t know why … anyway, but there are a lot of good bards back in Viridistan, where I’ve lived all my life. This is good ale. Plenty better than the sailors drink in Valon! Can I have another? Here’s a silver because I have … anyway thanks. So you’re a Bard and you’re taking requests? Oh alright wait, wait … I’ll write down some – carve them on the table? Seriously? Well if the management doesn’t mind … maybe you could play these especially when that eladrin comes down … Ashleigh, she’s so … well she’s a little mean but … anyway she’s the flask of burning oil … yeah Laird is with us too. She’s really funny. She’s half-elven. I think Illander likes her. He’s smart, he read me one of his poems and he could be a bard too. Wow, I’m sure talking a lot! Oh I get another ale with that silver? That’s great. Thank you.



Could you play …



No Dragons! (Gotta Get Someplace Uneaten!)

When My Fair Eladrin Girl Did Turn Her Violet Eyes To Me

Feystep! (Into My Heart!)

Born to Cleave – hells yeah! Valon Junior Guard Cadets #1!

Second Wind

My Baby is a Doppelganger

Sweet Child O’ the Feywild

Walkin’ On Radiant Damage

Charge This Way

What’s Level Got To Do With It?

Shifting the Night Away

Do You really Want To Mark Me?

Minion’s Delight

Don’t Go Back To the City State of the Invincible Overlord

Valon Nights 4ever

Day 1, Laird's Triple-Locked Journal

From the private, triple-locked journal of Laird Sonoly:

All I can say is...what?? Just happened? One day I'm babysitting my little brother while mom is at he market and the next day I'm off fulfilling some prophecy and nearly dying of fever on a pirate ship off the coast of Malakkar!

It's true! Just the other morning I was playing hide and seek with Nails, when an OWL flew to the window, like, seeking ME! It had a letter addressed specifically to ME from the COUNCIL of TWELVE?! They wanted me to come to the Nimbus Apparatus in like an HOUR. (I've been to the Nimbus Apparatus before, but I've never gotten that close, but this time I had, like, an official invitation!) But of course mom wasn't home when she said she'd be...ugh! But that's ok, I found her at the market and gave Nails to her 'cuz I had to GO! At first she didn't believe me that it was a real letter, she thought I forged it. Which, probably every OTHER time would probably be true, but not this time.

I got to the Nimbus Apparatus and there was this dorky green-skinned pencil-neck exchange student named Saddush, he had a letter too. The tight-assed dwarf let us up and the next thing I knew, we're flying straight up on a cloud! I acted like it was no big deal, but I was FREAKING OUT. Not so much 'cuz I've never been to Upper Valon before, but, hello, flying cloud! And then the NEXT thing I knew, we were standing in front of the council of 12! And another guy and girl were there: this sorta-cute-in-a-tortured/deep-sorta-way eladrin, Illeander, but also, UGH. This CLOWN of a eladrin, so ridiculous, I think her name is Ashleigh? Or Ashley or Ashlee? In any case I'll try to forget it. ANYWAY. So the next thing I knew, Arterious the Bear (apparently ashleigh is his granddaughter, so aha, then it became clear what was what) was bowing to us all and giving us presents. I got burglary gloves! Which is so ironic! I mean, aren't the council of 12 supposed to be encouraging me to be all lawful and stuff?

But they say there's no free lunch, or free burglary gloves anyway, and so A. the B. started into his speech. And finally all the weird dreams I've been having make sense, because he said we're all Chosen Ones, we've ALL been having those dreams, and they hold the key to, like, really important stuff. And he talked about what a big responsibility and burden this was, we have to be all secretive and work together and take this crystal ball called the Dungeon Master and, for starters at least, save these halfling tribesmen from my (and their) dreams? I don't really understand all of what he was saying, or what it means...what any of this means... all I can say is, if I am bound to 3 other people for the REST of my LIFE, I can't believe one of them has green skin and one of them is named Ashleiiighyeyyyyyy. Kill me NOW. But Illeander is ok, he took care of me later on the pirate ship when I was hurling my lungs out from filth fever and seasickness. But I guess it's the least he could do considering he's the one who EXPLODED a giant rat on me and covered me in disgusting hot rat guts (<- aka, "essense of ashleigh"). UGH.


There's SO much more to tell, but I'm getting tired now, I'm still recovering from being so sick...I got healed in Malakkar (which IS as cool as everyone says!) but I'm still feeling a little iffy. I don't know if all of this is for real or what, but for now, it's fine by me to get out of V-alone for however long it's gonna be. I just wish i could have said goodbye to mom and Nails, but, it's not like I'm never going to see them again, right?!

Day 1, Illander's Diary

Dear Whomever,

So much is happening! I was told a few days ago that I'm one of the "chosen ones" and I was sent out on a quest with Asleigh (who of course was chosen too) and two kids from Lower Valon. There's Sadush, a green human who lives in a run down old shack... just like a poet! The other kid is a half elf named Laird. She seems super tough and intimidating. I saw her do a round off with a dagger in her mouth!

What are we chosen for? good question. We must battle a sleeping evil that's about to wake up or something. We're all having dreams about it and stuff. I almost forgot... We took a pirate ship! Sadush and Laird got bit by giant rats and had filth fever, but I nursed them back to health. Ashleigh didn't do anything. I'm trying to see the good in her for Erevan's sake, but she makes it really hard.

It feels good to take care of people. I like being needed. Maybe if I keep working hard the others will like having me around.

I feel so much less sad out here than I did at home. I mean, I've never been chosen for anything. I always thought, why can't it ever be me? Why can't I be special like Erevan or Ashleigh or Iagon? My parents are so proud which feels good, actually. I don't think they've ever been proud of me except for when I did my ritual and gained power.

Anyway, we have to go battle goblins and receive a magicum core so an alchemist can transport us to a secret island in his magic bathysphere. Oh, I almost forgot to mention the best part... we're traveling under aliases, so I don't have to be an Illrune! I'm so excited!

I wrote this poem. It's called "Carry Me":

Water.
Ice.
Splash and whoosh.
Carry me, ship.
Fly me far on wings of anticipation
for the mysterious "what's to come".
Carry me from the tedium of high society and
the boredom of the bourgousie
high
in their "Upper City". They who
look down on the rest. "The lower".
Never knowing it's those they look down on,
those they pity,
that walk in grace and nobility.
Carry me, ship.
Carry me through water, through ice.
Whoosh.
Carry me far enough,
so I won't come back.

It has a few kinks yet, but I'll keep working on it.

Keep it Secret,
Illander Illrune aka "Iagon"

Day 1, Ashleigh Oberholt to Erevan Illrune

My Dearest Love Erevan,


It is so hard to be a Chosen One because it means that I have to be away from you!--but otherwise, I seem to be up to the challenge. I wish I could say the same for the other (non-Eladrin) Chosen Ones, who just got over being miserably ill from a battle with rats--RATS! Daddy always told me that the lack of privilege made folk from Lower Valon "hearty," but I have seen precious little proof of it. One of them is--I kid you not!--totally green, like kale.

I'm taking very good care of your little brother--He's so sweet and well-meaning--I'm a little annoyed that he talked me into spending all of my money on carrion crawler brain juice, but the little guy was so excited about it that I couldn't help it. He's just like a little kid! Of course, his powers (such as they are) are nothing compared to yours. I wish YOU had been a Chosen One instead, but I guess that would go against the whole being-born-on-the-same-day prophecy--I *love* that you are so mature and strong and wise. I miss you, and all of Upper Valon--the rest of the world seems so dingy--or most of it, anyway. Did you know ice was COLD?

The wizards and alchemists downstairs are making such a row. What could it be about, I wonder? The people here are very WEIRD! Illander and I visited a twisted old wizard today who should be able to get us where we want to go, but first we have to find a magicum core that some goblins stole. He has something called a bathysphere which goes underwater.

Speaking of magic, guess what?! I have almost mastered that little trick you showed me of making things burst into flame. It just goes to show that anything is possible for me when I put my mind to it!

Love and hearts to you my Erevan,
Ashleigh

P.S. I wish you could see the flying dolphins at sunset. They are so beautiful. I whispered to them that I knew how they felt--but I can NEVER truly know how they feel without you by my side!!!!

Day 0, Illander's Diary

Dear Whomever,

Nobody in Upper Valon knows what it's like to be me. Mother and Father always say, "When I was your age this", and "when I was your age that." They were never my age. I wish things would go back to the way they were before the incident because everybody looks at me when I'm out on the town and I can hear people whispering about me too and nobody ever looked at me like this before. I know it's because of what I did. People know.

I just wish I could be alone.

Mother and Father keep saying how proud or me they are bu I can't see why. All I did was read some book in the library. I didn't work for the power like Iagon or Erevan. I'm no good at magic. I probably would have been an awful wizard anyway. At least I don't have to study it anymore. Whoever said all the Illrune men had to be wizards, anyway?

Speaking of Erevan... Ashleigh came around this week. Everybody thinks she's so beautiful and talented and of course she is but really, deep down, I'm still afraid of her. I think she'll always be the little girl who called me carrion crawler and tried to push me off of Upper Valon. She's been nicer to me, but part of me still doesn't trust her. Am I bad person for writing such mean things about her? I have to make an effort to be more welcoming to her, if for no other reason than for Erevan's happiness. He is my brother and I love him even though her punches me sometimes and mostly ignores me.

He won't be able to ignore me forever. I can feel something shifting in me and it scares me. I can do things now that I'm not sure I feel comfortable with.

P.S.- Iagon sent me a conch shell from the Merfolk!

Keep it Secret,
Illander Illrune

Day 0, Laird's Triple-Locked Journal

From the private, triple-locked journal of Laird Sonoly:


So I live in Valon, big WHOOP. If you removed the V and added an e, the name just as easily becomes the word ALONE. And that's what I am. I live in Valon but I might as well live up a dwarf's butt. Mom says I'm lucky to live in such an "enlightened" city, where everyone is treated "equally" and knowledge and the arts are "valued." A city where there are so many "opportunities" for "young" people, like that I get to go to school with all the hoity-toity eladrin from ooh-la-la UPPER VALON. Like I'm so lucky that that hag Gilthoniela from the Council has a thing for "dad" and she pulled some strings to get me admitted, despite my "half-breed" (her exact words, THANKS) status. I hate school. I hate everything about school. Except I guess Mistress Illinewyn, the Fine Arts teacher, she's ok I guess. For my self-portraiture assignment last fall, I stole one of my dad's paintings from the headmaster's antechamber and painted it black and turned it in, and he was going to expel me (please DO!!) and make me pay for it because it's supposedly worth like so much money, but she talked him out of it, and she even gave me a pretty good mark for that assignment. She said that as a portrait, it reflected a "poignant disregard for legacy and an internal struggle for belonging." Well, whatever. So yeah, she's pretty cool except I really would have loved to have been expelled. If only so I don't have to smell that anorexic twit Ashleigh's stench as her soul decomposes in front of me in history class. I can't believe they don't expel HER, she is so mean and everyone knows it. She even told Nails that I wasn't really his sister because he has a different dad than me. He's only 8, he doesn't even know what "half-sister" means, he started crying because he thought they were going to cut me in half.

Anyway, thank Corellon that I have some escape. If I couldn't sneak out at night and explore the city on my own, I don't know what I'd do. I only got caught once, when I ALMOST stole an antique helmet of the sylvan guard (WHY do I need an antique helmet of the sylvan guard? I don't!) from Seneschal Evershine and I would've gotten away with it too if it weren't for her stupid dog. (I got out of that one by acting like I was under a drow Hypnosis spell, she totally fell for it.) I'm not gonna go out tonight, though, I'm too tired. I haven't been able to sleep in class like usual (ha ha) because of these weird dreams. So annoying! Maybe tomorrow though. I want to climb up Astronomer's Tower and write backwards on the outer lens of the big telescope, so when they look through they'll see it says "I pee rainbows" or something. Ha ha! They'll never know how that got there.

Day 0, Sadush's Reflective Composition Assignment

Master Alethelasimarithinwyndarethdril
Sadush Seaborn
Remedial Elven Junior Guard Cadet
Fall Semester
Lower City Docks
3½ Dock-End
Reflective Composition Assignment



Topic 4: “On the Gradual Gathering of Grief as We Eladrin Slip by the Centuries into the Waking Sleep of the Feywild, Nevermore to Walk the Snowy Woods of this World ‘Neath the Frozen Towers of Valon”



I feel that this topic applies to me because even though I’m not an Eladrin or Elf or Half-Elf, or a Halfling or Dwarf or anything like that for example a gnome but am only a human and will die after only a few decades unless I am killed in battle defending the walls of Valon which would be a great honor and really is my fondest wish, as the poets say!, except that my tutors have taught me valuable life lessons about life and everything and that it’s precious and we should live everyday as if it’s your last because someday it will be and all the Eladrin kids look bemused and all the Elven kids laugh merrily because they say, “But teacher that day will come long centuries from now and why have a care for anything and why not just take it merrily and have some lambas” but they don’t understand that for certain people there are certain facts about their background that make them different from other people in Valon of the Icy Towers High and Low the Glory of the North and these certain people will not live for long centuries but will probably be killed on patrol by a dire polar bear and even if they don’t will get old and die while other persons who don’t have this certain background are just messing around eating lambas and not taking anything seriously even when it’s stuff that’s important they are laughing merrily like how to do a really effective “tide of iron” rush which is not easy AT ALL and it’s NOT just about being strong because it requires you to judge the angle of your opponent’s weapon to make sure that your shield both a) deflects it above you as you crouch into your approach (the 5th form swordmaster says that if you don’t get “a” right, “b” doesn’t matter and that really cracks me up like every time because it’s true! If you don’t get it right you’ll be killed by your opponent’s weapon and you’re dead! Lol!) and b) ….



… and finally k) you’ll want to kill the ones who are flanking you PDQ then return to first position! I really love Advanced Swords because my guidance counselor says I have a facility with the curriculum, but I have a difficulty with other areas of the curriculum, like Elven no offense Master Alethelasimarithinwyndarethdril, even though I really appreciate the Eladrin and Elves and really all the Fey in general of Valon for taking me in after my ship went down and I was cast adrift and nearly drowned and was freezing to death on the shore and the wolves were coming out of the woods for me and I’m not kidding and boy was I glad to see the patrol, even though they looked at me funny and I didn’t speak one word of Elven and they said that I spoke common funny too with accent of Viridistan where I came from but I sure don’t want to go back even though most of the other people there are humans and have green skin like me so I wouldn’t feel like such a freak but if you want to know the truth most people are really cool about it and say it’s not my fault though they keep making stupid plant jokes like I haven’t heard them like a mess of score of times each which actually relates to what I wanted to say about the topic, which is topic 4, which you know what it is because you gave us the topic choices and they were all very integral but I decided that topic 4 was more integral for me because even though I’m not and Eladrin or anything and stuff but I do know about the gradual gathering of grief because I’ve been gathering plenty of it from Ashleigh Oberholt who is the head of the Eladrin Elite Cheerleading Squad and the Junior Guard Cadets of which I am one were cooperating on battle drills, cheers and mournful songs of the forgotten beauties of ancient Valon though mostly we Cadets just stick to battle drills and cheering which is good when it’s loud because then my accent is not as irritating to others and we were warming up and I was doing alternate toe touches to stretch out and I was holding a bent over position with my butt up in the air and those cadet dress clothes are pretty tight and she comes up behind me and I am sure she was saying something about how I looked funny with my butt out and how it is green, which it is I’m not saying it’s not because everyone knows but she didn’t have to talk about it and she couldn’t even see my actual butt because of the pants and even though she was talking all fancy in high Eladrin with all these “cool” words from millennia gone I could totally tell the kind of thing she was saying and it was all “I’d like to get my hands on that butt” which means she wants to show that it’s green which everyone already knows and boy she is mean and bossy but on the other hand she really knows her stuff because the Elite are very tight and battleready and the truth is us cadets are mostly sort of sloppy but on the other hand they have better equipment and they clean things with magic and we mostly just have to scrub a lot and use fishoil to keep our weapons shiny, which I can hardly smell anymore but other people can and she’s really very beautiful though please don’t tell anyone I wrote that Master Alethelasimarithinwyndarethdril because it would be very embarrassing for me personally in fact I wish I hadn’t said it but I don’t have a magical pen that can take ink away and I can’t really afford another piece of vellum but so I am asking you to please understand and not say anything to anyone and especially not her father who is a really great person and maybe she’ll be more like him later anyway but it doesn’t matter because who am I kidding and that’s my reflective composition I hope you like it and will give me a good grade because I tried hard but please don’t tell her.

Day 0, Ashleigh's Diary

Dear Diary,

I led the Eladrin Elite squad today. Everyone performed miserably! Our martial flair was absolutely flairless, the swords couldn't cut air, and the spear section might as well have impaled itself. Seriously, I do not know what these wretches do in their spare time but it CERTAINLY isn't practicing formations. Also, Councilman Verun's daughter looks SO fat. I pointed this out as subtly as I could by counting double when I came to her in roll call. She left crying, so I think she took the hint.

Father says I have to attend the Council with him soon. He insists that I spend time with the Woman-Who-Is-Not-My-Mother (also known as the Queen of Stupidity. Step-Manticore, or simply THE BITCH), who can teach me the finer points of speaking in the House. I told him I could pick up the same wisdom from him, but he says that he is far too busy. He IS a High Councilman, of course. Other girls should be so lucky.

I had another dream last night. Not pleasant, but then it seems that hardship is my lot in life. No one really knows what I face EVERY DAY. Father says I'm very hard on people--but life is hard on ME; perhaps because it expects so much from me. I suppose it IS rather silly of me to expect as much from other people...But if I were one of them, I would feel privileged to serve me.

xoxoxo
Ashleigh

The Players

Sadush Seaborn...........................................Adrian

Shipwrecked Young Sailor of Viridistan, now Soldier of Valon
HUMAN FIGHTER

Ashleigh Oberholt.........................................Zach

Valonian Noble, Leader of the Eladrin Elite Enthusiasm Squad
ELADRIN WARLORD

Laird Sonoly.................................................Zoe

Daughter of a Bohemian Painter, Subversive Adolescent
HALF-ELF ROGUE

Illander Illrune.............................................Josh

Valonian Noble, Aspiring and Melancholy Poet
ELADRIN WARLOCK

THE DUNGEON MASTER.........................................Jeff