I think…I’m going crazy. Do you know, necessarily, when you’re going crazy? Or is it when you’re convinced that you’re *not* crazy… that it’s totally conceivable that... oh, you just happened to bump into a 60 foot tall demon prince of the undead (who, by the way, doesn’t exist anymore)…maybe that’s the tip-off that, yes, you’re crazy.
So yes, did I mention that I went to the Shadowfell ?! And, you know, we fought and killed some demons, no big whoop, and then I was sneaking along, minding my own business, and I happened upon, um, ORCUS?! Who was standing there, not 20 feet away from me, surrounded in prayer (or something) by a vampire, a wight, and a demon? I couldn’t…believe what I was seeing, but I also wasn’t dumb enough to stick around for another heartbeat to either confirm or deny my vision.
I don’t even remember what I did next, it was like a dream…or a nightmare…I remember a lot of running and holding my breath. Then there was another ride in the bathysphere back to Malakar, I barely remember it.
It’s weird, I’ve been thinking moment-to-moment for so long now, I can’t convince my body or my brain to relax. Plus, I don’t feel like I *should*, even if I could. I don’t think the others believe me…what I saw…I don’t believe it myself. But what else could it have been?? And real or illusion, what could it mean in either case??
I swear, I never thought I’d be so happy to be trapped in an underwater Bathysphere with a re-animated dead body, a blabbermouthed and possibly psychotic alchemist, and of course the rest of the “chosen ones.” If you think about it, it seems so unlikely that the four of us could ever conceivably work together… if you take a step back for two seconds, it’s pretty funny, really…there’s me, a sarcastic and mostly useless (and possibly crazy) shoplifter, and we’ve also got a spoiled daddy’s-girl / leader of the Eladrin enthusiasm squad, a pimply-faced green suck-up, and a walking cliché of a brooding teen poet. But, work together we do…I have come to depend on Ashleigh, Saddush and Ileander to an almost inconceivable extent. I mean, I literally trust them with my life, and they’ve saved me when I thought I was a goner…more times than I can count already! It’s scary.
These last few days in particular… I honestly didn’t think I was going to make it out of that one to even WRITE in this journal! We are truly bound together now, for better or worse, to see the outcome of these sinister dreams out, for better or worse.
So we’ve come back to Malakar to see what we can uncover with our inquiries rather than our swords. We are just not powerful enough to face whatever evil is brewing in the Shadowfell. Some sort of cult or something? The lizardman who spearheaded (no pun intended, haha!) the ritual sacrifices / necromantic conversions of the halflings of Skaversmoore, we killed him, but now we see he’s just one figure in a larger plot. Some ancient evil is awakening in the tomb of the dragon emporer – some evil connected to an ancient Arushulan empire. Inside the tomb, we found a strange portal to the Shadowfell, where we saw countless evil beings wearing the same flaming-skull amulet (which I now realize is a reference to Orcus’ legendary skull-headed mace), and carrying similar scythes as our original adversary. We’ve all had dreams about a hyena man entering a mausoleum…an infant child being carried away by Jaquamule, the Eladrin poison-broker who Ashleigh and Ileander visited in Malakar.
My head spins with how all these things might connects. Actually my head just hurts. I banged it about 10 times when we were fighting these behemoths by the river…they had these mace-like tails, and they kept knocking me down, it was infuriating!! Anyway, I’d better get some rest and see if I can’t get rid of this headache. I just pray to Corellon to sleep peacefully, without dreams…or if I am to dream, let it be of frivolities of no consequence.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Day 7, Ashleigh's War Journal
Dearest W.J.,
Here I am in the bathysphere again, but with much more adventure under my belt. Can you believe that Laird saw the demon prince of the undead, Orcus? It is quite a terrifying thought--and *thought* it just might have been, as the Decorum Enforcer told us that NO GOD would have been oblivious to our presence. I wonder if Laird is as batty as Illander. Still, if what she saw WAS Orcus, or even looked like Orcus, I'm kinda glad I didn't see it.
Sadush was quieter than normal--he hardly talked at all--perhaps he will soon begin to grow leaves.
Now to take stock of the situation. We are looking for an eladrin teenager or a hyenaman or both. We'll try Malacar, but I don't know how exactly we're supposed to look around. Jacamoolay is clearly a part of things, but we can't have her know that we're investigating her--especially because she's already suspicious of us.
Now let me vent. I miss Erevan terribly, and Daddy too, but I'm beginning to think I don't miss either of them enough. I miss feeling like queen of the world, though, and lording it over the other girls of the Enthusiasm Squad. Being out here on my own--even with the other Chosen Ones by my side--makes me feel lonely and vulnerable. Never mind the fact that I look death in the eye ALMOST EVERY DAY!!!! I'm trying--REALLY trying--to relate to the others. But no, I'm alone in the world, it seems. I wonder if Illander really writes poetry? Perhaps I should try:
Why do I feel so hopeless and bad?
Maybe because I am lonely and sad.
Maybe it's because I don't have my dad,
Or maybe I miss my beautiful lad.*
But maybe it's just cuz I'm a beautiful girl
Alone in her heart and alone in the world.
This is hard!!! Maybe I should try to write a poem that doesn't rhyme, like Illander suggested.
*Erevan is who I mean.
Here I am in the bathysphere again, but with much more adventure under my belt. Can you believe that Laird saw the demon prince of the undead, Orcus? It is quite a terrifying thought--and *thought* it just might have been, as the Decorum Enforcer told us that NO GOD would have been oblivious to our presence. I wonder if Laird is as batty as Illander. Still, if what she saw WAS Orcus, or even looked like Orcus, I'm kinda glad I didn't see it.
Sadush was quieter than normal--he hardly talked at all--perhaps he will soon begin to grow leaves.
Now to take stock of the situation. We are looking for an eladrin teenager or a hyenaman or both. We'll try Malacar, but I don't know how exactly we're supposed to look around. Jacamoolay is clearly a part of things, but we can't have her know that we're investigating her--especially because she's already suspicious of us.
Now let me vent. I miss Erevan terribly, and Daddy too, but I'm beginning to think I don't miss either of them enough. I miss feeling like queen of the world, though, and lording it over the other girls of the Enthusiasm Squad. Being out here on my own--even with the other Chosen Ones by my side--makes me feel lonely and vulnerable. Never mind the fact that I look death in the eye ALMOST EVERY DAY!!!! I'm trying--REALLY trying--to relate to the others. But no, I'm alone in the world, it seems. I wonder if Illander really writes poetry? Perhaps I should try:
Why do I feel so hopeless and bad?
Maybe because I am lonely and sad.
Maybe it's because I don't have my dad,
Or maybe I miss my beautiful lad.*
But maybe it's just cuz I'm a beautiful girl
Alone in her heart and alone in the world.
This is hard!!! Maybe I should try to write a poem that doesn't rhyme, like Illander suggested.
*Erevan is who I mean.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Day 5, Ashleigh's War Journal
Dear Diary War Journal,
It's going to be hard for me to get used to your new name! Anyway, I have a great victory to report. The Chosen Ones entered the Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, destroyed the lizardman shaman, and now have the amulet we have all seen in our dreams. Almost as important as all that was the discovery of a new little friend.
Diary War Journal, Lil' Genius is made of onyx. It looks like he's a chihuahua statue, and really, he is...Until I say his name! Then appears beside me the loveliest little lively breathing chihuahua-dog you, I, or ANYONE has ever seen, with glossy big eyes and short black hair and paws that clatter and tap. So cute! I do wish, though, that he didn't have to disappear after eight hours, so he could curl up beside me when I rest. I am very lonely these days!
The other Chosen Ones are company, I guess, but--well, there are some problems. Sadush is nice--there, I said it--but, you know, GREEN. Laird clearly respects and perhaps worships me, but it's SO HARD to be a GODDESS!!! Illander--He's really beginning to grate on me. It's clear that he has massive insecurities that he covers up by being mean to other people, like me. I know he can't use real magic because he's not smart enough, has handsome and talented older brothers that make him look like the family goblin, and would rather be in a bubble bath with Ambassador Telimqiv than tromping around in the desolate wilderness,--but SERIOUSLY?
Well, at least I have the company of Lil' Genius. Aw, he's chasing his tail! Bye bye War Journal.
It's going to be hard for me to get used to your new name! Anyway, I have a great victory to report. The Chosen Ones entered the Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, destroyed the lizardman shaman, and now have the amulet we have all seen in our dreams. Almost as important as all that was the discovery of a new little friend.
The other Chosen Ones are company, I guess, but--well, there are some problems. Sadush is nice--there, I said it--but, you know, GREEN. Laird clearly respects and perhaps worships me, but it's SO HARD to be a GODDESS!!! Illander--He's really beginning to grate on me. It's clear that he has massive insecurities that he covers up by being mean to other people, like me. I know he can't use real magic because he's not smart enough, has handsome and talented older brothers that make him look like the family goblin, and would rather be in a bubble bath with Ambassador Telimqiv than tromping around in the desolate wilderness,--but SERIOUSLY?
Well, at least I have the company of Lil' Genius. Aw, he's chasing his tail! Bye bye War Journal.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Dearest Erevan,
You'd be so proud of me if you could see me now. My powers have grown exponentially since leaving home! Just today I figured out how to produce balls of fire, which really came in handy against some undead we encountered in a mausoleum today.
I don't know how much mother and father have told you. We're on an isolated island (which we came to via a maniacal alchemist's bathysphere, but that's another story) because we'd been having dreams about halflings being ritually sacrificed by lizard people. These dreams turned out to be true and we were nearly slaughtered by the lizard folk until their leader (a teen, like me) ran off.
We tracked him to the Crypt of the Dragon King where we slaughtered him and his followers, which included two acid blobs... very difficult to kill, though I have to say my party owes a huge debt to my pact with the stars. I've saved them all now at least once. Anyway, we retrieved some dark magic items from the mausoleum... don't know what we'll do with them.
The real reason I'm writing this letter to you though is to discuss Ashleigh. I'm really worried about her, brother. While she's always been a little bossy and controlling, she seems to have completely lost control of her senses. She's become entirely cruel to the other three of us, me in particular. She says the vilest things about both me and our family and now she's got Sadush on her side. He said he wished they had a "real magic user" in the party, which really hurt my feelings. My powers have saved him time and time again!
Worst of all, and this is the hardest part to write, Ashleigh seems to rejoice in killing just for the sport of it. I wish I could say it was only our foes, but she's taken to slaughtering cats and birds and woodland creatures and eating them raw. She collects their bones in a little pouch like precious gems. She doesn't know I know, so don't say anything. The darkness we've encountered on our mission is indescribable and I understand how a person could snap.
I hate to be the one to say these things, but Ashleigh is no longer the girl you knew, nor do I think she will be again. I look into her and I see a sticky black heart made of pitch. You told me shortly before I left that you were going to propose to her. I love you, brother, and you know I love Ashleigh, but I strongly suggest you hold off until she receives serious help, if not just reconsidering all together. I only write these things because of my concern for both your and Ashleigh's well being. I know they are difficult to read. Please be discreet in sharing this information. I fear for my safety around Ashleigh now. As such, and this goes without saying, please don't tach her any more magic until we're sure she can wield it wisely.
I love you, brother. You and Iagon would be so proud of me. Is he still with the Mer people? Give my love to mother and father!
Always Your Baby Brother,
Illander Illrune
I don't know how much mother and father have told you. We're on an isolated island (which we came to via a maniacal alchemist's bathysphere, but that's another story) because we'd been having dreams about halflings being ritually sacrificed by lizard people. These dreams turned out to be true and we were nearly slaughtered by the lizard folk until their leader (a teen, like me) ran off.
We tracked him to the Crypt of the Dragon King where we slaughtered him and his followers, which included two acid blobs... very difficult to kill, though I have to say my party owes a huge debt to my pact with the stars. I've saved them all now at least once. Anyway, we retrieved some dark magic items from the mausoleum... don't know what we'll do with them.
The real reason I'm writing this letter to you though is to discuss Ashleigh. I'm really worried about her, brother. While she's always been a little bossy and controlling, she seems to have completely lost control of her senses. She's become entirely cruel to the other three of us, me in particular. She says the vilest things about both me and our family and now she's got Sadush on her side. He said he wished they had a "real magic user" in the party, which really hurt my feelings. My powers have saved him time and time again!
Worst of all, and this is the hardest part to write, Ashleigh seems to rejoice in killing just for the sport of it. I wish I could say it was only our foes, but she's taken to slaughtering cats and birds and woodland creatures and eating them raw. She collects their bones in a little pouch like precious gems. She doesn't know I know, so don't say anything. The darkness we've encountered on our mission is indescribable and I understand how a person could snap.
I hate to be the one to say these things, but Ashleigh is no longer the girl you knew, nor do I think she will be again. I look into her and I see a sticky black heart made of pitch. You told me shortly before I left that you were going to propose to her. I love you, brother, and you know I love Ashleigh, but I strongly suggest you hold off until she receives serious help, if not just reconsidering all together. I only write these things because of my concern for both your and Ashleigh's well being. I know they are difficult to read. Please be discreet in sharing this information. I fear for my safety around Ashleigh now. As such, and this goes without saying, please don't tach her any more magic until we're sure she can wield it wisely.
I love you, brother. You and Iagon would be so proud of me. Is he still with the Mer people? Give my love to mother and father!
Always Your Baby Brother,
Illander Illrune
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