Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Chypirius, the Goblin King

Real adventures involve a lot of sleeping on dirt and rocks. I wish I had more gold. I’d summon nature spirits to build us campsites every night if I could. Oh well.

We sloshed through the bog and fought some spitting drakes.

We also did some recon. Tamsen and Eugenium did their Eladrin teleporting trick to the top of trees, but they both thought the keep was unoccupied. After we approached, and Eugenium was on the receiving end of an arrowhead, we soon realized, it was not!

There was a big battle against the goblins of the keep. Tamsen and I are a great team! She and I stood side by side and together brought down the drawbridge. Eugenium was great too. I like that guy more day by day. I hate to admit it, but I like Pavel less day by day. He totally ran off and we haven’t seen him at all. Even though he’s prone to brooding diva trips, I do sincerely hope the guy is okay.

So yeah, the drawbridge came down, but there was a big barred gate. Of course! Unfortunately, my blade dancing has allowed me to develop a bit of grace and balance, but my arms are weaker than a Dwarf’s sense of humor. Once we realized we couldn’t get through, we did the smart thing. We ran.

In running, we found a wooded area and a magic pool… OF SLAVERY! Oh damn. Then I had the best idea I’ve had in my entire adventuring career, which yes, isn’t saying much. But check this out… if the evil elf in the keep was throwing the items of teenagers into the pool to turn them into slaves… what if we went back to the keep, collected some arrows, and turned some of those goblins into our slaves?! I’m not a gloater, but hey, I’m pretty proud of that idea.

It took awhile, but up came a goblin named Nosepick. I sang Fast Friends, then sang Word of Friendship. I told Nosepick I was his new master. I told him of all the riches we could share. I also managed to convince him that the gatekeeper really had it coming to him. So together, we all returned to the keep by night. Nosepick, the poor fellow, got a little confused, but managed to succeed in his task. The poor guy died in the ensuing battle.

I’d say more about the battle, but right now, this is all the time I have.

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